5 Keys To Success No Matter Who Or Where You Are In The Universe

5. Exist. It's important that you exist. Otherwise, your ability to do things may be compromised by your inability to exist to do those things.

4. Learn to make cakes. Cakes are delicious, and you never know when you'll need a good cake. Everyone loves cakes, except people who don't exist (because they've never had them and they're jealous), in which case, who cares, what are they going to do about it?

3. Create an effective defense or escape plan for when those people who don't exist finally start existing and suddenly want to punish us for not acknowledging them prior to their existing. Perhaps start ceasing to exist yourself. Yeah, NOW WHAT, people who until just recently didn't exist?? You might exist, but now we don't, so you're, once again, not on our team. BOOM.

2. Appease the giraffes. Never forget. Appease the giraffes. You've been warned.

1. And finally, figure out a way for us to eat cakes again. Ever since we started not existing, we haven't been able to make, eat, or even see a cake. Because technology thus far only allows for cakes that exist to be made, eaten and seen by those who exist. But those folks who now exist, who until recently didn't exist -- they're laughing it up with their sweet, moist, delicious cakes.

This diagram should clear up any confusion.

If you cease to exist, you'll be just fine. Unless you love cakes, then it might be a tough road ahead. Now go get 'em!

 

Also on HuffPost:

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25 Honest Selfies That Sum Up What It's Like To Be A Mom

Last month, actress Olivia Wilde shared a frazzled selfie that resonated with parents everywhere. "I call this hairstyle, 'keep the kid alive,'" she wrote in the caption. "Products you'll need: sweat, string cheese, diaper rash cream, chewed up crayon, snot, and an enthusiastic spritz of panic."

We asked the HuffPost Parents Facebook community to share selfies that sum up what parenting is like for them and received hundreds of fatigue-filled responses.

From the messy hair to the dark under-eye circles to the moments of clarity in the midst of chaos, here are 25 spot-on parenting selfies.

Also on HuffPost:

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Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/11/03/25-honest-selfies-that-sum-up-what-its-like-to-be-a-mom_n_8 ... and provided by entertainment-movie-news.com

Newly Discovered Land Snail Is The Tiniest In The World

Apparently, it's a snail-beat-snail world out there.

Just a month after being crowned the smallest land snail in the world, the Chinese Angustopila dominikae has to give up its title to a newly discovered itsy-bitsy species.

A team of Dutch and Malaysian researchers recently found an even tinier land snail, named Acmella nana, on the Malaysian island of Borneo -- it's about 0.16 millimeters smaller than Angustopila. In a paper published in the journal ZooKeys on Monday, the researchers describe the small species as being an average size of 0.7 millimeters.

And, it turns out that Acmella nana wasn't the only little snail on the island.

"Almost half of the species in Borneo are less than two millimeters in size," Dr. Menno Schilthuizen, a professor of evolution at Leiden University in the Netherlands and a co-author of the paper, told The Huffington Post in an email. "Our paper was in review when that paper on Angustopila dominikae came out and it was only then that we realized that one of 'our' species was actually smaller."

The researchers also identified 47 other new species of snail in Borneo. The new findings are based on over 25 years of research and documentation of Malaysia's mollusks. 

To find the previously unknown creatures, Schilthuizen said that they gathered bags of soil from the foot of limestone cliffs and then tossed the soil into buckets of water.

"All the sand and clay sinks, but the flotsam contains thousands of empty snail shells, which float," he said. "We would probably not have seen them by the naked eye."

Next, the researchers hope to find living specimens of their newfound mollusks in an effort to better understand and protect them.

"Our method yields mostly empty shells," Schilthuizen said, "so we are still in the dark about their ecology and behavior."

The newly discovered land snails are slow-moving and tend to remain in the same small habitats for generations. In fact, seven of the new species can only be found in the highest mountain in Malaysia, Borneo's Mount Kinabalu. Another newfound species lives only at a cave entrance in Malaysia's second highest mountain, Mount Trusmadi.  

Since they tend to remain in small areas for a long period of time, the snail species are endemic to Borneo, and are similar to the finch species that Darwin encountered on the Galapagos Islands in 1835.

The land snails, however, are not small enough to be crowned the smallest in the world. A sea snail, Ammonicera minortalis, holds that record as it ranges in size from about 0.32 to 0.46 millimeters in length.

Also on HuffPost Science:

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Watch An Adorable Puppy Lost At Sea Get Rescued By Italian Sailors

This paddling pup survived some pretty ruff waves.

An adorable Labrador named Noodle was rescued by a group of Italian sailors from the RYCC Savoia yacht club after they spotted him swimming alone in the Gulf on Naples, last month.

Massimiliano Cappa, the club's director, said that the dog had been swimming for hours and was visibly shaking, according to a HuffPost translation of an article by La Repubblica Napoli.  

The passengers captured footage of the rescue, which shows them beckoning to Noodle until he swam close enough to the boat and they could scoop him onboard:

The passengers warmed the freezing pupsicle with a blow-dryer, and made sure to give him lots of love. Initially, they thought that the young dog was without an owner and were hoping to find someone to adopt it.

Luckily, Noodle's owners got in contact with the yacht club, and were reunited with their little guy, RYCC Savoia said on Facebook.

The relieved owners told La Repubblica Napoli that they were traveling on a ferry earlier that morning from the island of Ischia when Noodle fell overboard. They reportedly told the boat operators about the incident, but the operators could not see a dog in the water and believed that Noodle had likely drowned.  

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Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/11/04/labrador-puppy-rescued-by-sailors_n_8475212.html?utm_hp_ref ... and provided by entertainment-movie-news.com

Watch An Adorable Puppy Lost At Sea Get Rescued By Italian Sailors

This paddling pup survived some pretty ruff waves.

An adorable Labrador named Noodle was rescued by a group of Italian sailors from the RYCC Savoia yacht club after they spotted him swimming alone in the Gulf on Naples, last month.

Massimiliano Cappa, the club's director, said that the dog had been swimming for hours and was visibly shaking, according to a HuffPost translation of an article by La Repubblica Napoli.  

The passengers captured footage of the rescue, which shows them beckoning to Noodle until he swam close enough to the boat and they could scoop him onboard:

The passengers warmed the freezing pupsicle with a blow-dryer, and made sure to give him lots of love. Initially, they thought that the young dog was without an owner and were hoping to find someone to adopt it.

Luckily, Noodle's owners got in contact with the yacht club, and were reunited with their little guy, RYCC Savoia said on Facebook.

The relieved owners told La Repubblica Napoli that they were traveling on a ferry earlier that morning from the island of Ischia when Noodle fell overboard. They reportedly told the boat operators about the incident, but the operators could not see a dog in the water and believed that Noodle had likely drowned.  

Also on HuffPost:

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Source: http://feeds.huffingtonpost.com/c/35496/f/677553/s/4b3e670e/sc/3/l/0L0Shuffingtonpost0N0C20A150C110C ... and provided by entertainment-movie-news.com

5 Keys To Success No Matter Who Or Where You Are In The Universe

5. Exist. It's important that you exist. Otherwise, your ability to do things may be compromised by your inability to exist to do those things.

4. Learn to make cakes. Cakes are delicious, and you never know when you'll need a good cake. Everyone loves cakes, except people who don't exist (because they've never had them and they're jealous), in which case, who cares, what are they going to do about it?

3. Create an effective defense or escape plan for when those people who don't exist finally start existing and suddenly want to punish us for not acknowledging them prior to their existing. Perhaps start ceasing to exist yourself. Yeah, NOW WHAT, people who until just recently didn't exist?? You might exist, but now we don't, so you're, once again, not on our team. BOOM.

2. Appease the giraffes. Never forget. Appease the giraffes. You've been warned.

1. And finally, figure out a way for us to eat cakes again. Ever since we started not existing, we haven't been able to make, eat, or even see a cake. Because technology thus far only allows for cakes that exist to be made, eaten and seen by those who exist. But those folks who now exist, who until recently didn't exist -- they're laughing it up with their sweet, moist, delicious cakes.

This diagram should clear up any confusion.

If you cease to exist, you'll be just fine. Unless you love cakes, then it might be a tough road ahead. Now go get 'em!

 

Also on HuffPost:

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Source: http://feeds.huffingtonpost.com/c/35496/f/677553/s/4b3e0b6a/sc/15/l/0L0Shuffingtonpost0N0C20A150C10A ... and provided by entertainment-movie-news.com

25 Honest Selfies That Sum Up What It's Like To Be A Mom

Last month, actress Olivia Wilde shared a frazzled selfie that resonated with parents everywhere. "I call this hairstyle, 'keep the kid alive,'" she wrote in the caption. "Products you'll need: sweat, string cheese, diaper rash cream, chewed up crayon, snot, and an enthusiastic spritz of panic."

We asked the HuffPost Parents Facebook community to share selfies that sum up what parenting is like for them and received hundreds of fatigue-filled responses.

From the messy hair to the dark under-eye circles to the moments of clarity in the midst of chaos, here are 25 spot-on parenting selfies.

Also on HuffPost:

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Source: http://feeds.huffingtonpost.com/c/35496/f/677553/s/4b3e0b69/sc/14/l/0L0Shuffingtonpost0N0C20A150C110 ... and provided by entertainment-movie-news.com

Newly Discovered Land Snail Is The Tiniest In The World

Apparently, it's a snail-beat-snail world out there.

Just a month after being crowned the smallest land snail in the world, the Chinese Angustopila dominikae has to give up its title to a newly discovered itsy-bitsy species.

A team of Dutch and Malaysian researchers recently found an even tinier land snail, named Acmella nana, on the Malaysian island of Borneo -- it's about 0.16 millimeters smaller than Angustopila. In a paper published in the journal ZooKeys on Monday, the researchers describe the small species as being an average size of 0.7 millimeters.

And, it turns out that Acmella nana wasn't the only little snail on the island.

"Almost half of the species in Borneo are less than two millimeters in size," Dr. Menno Schilthuizen, a professor of evolution at Leiden University in the Netherlands and a co-author of the paper, told The Huffington Post in an email. "Our paper was in review when that paper on Angustopila dominikae came out and it was only then that we realized that one of 'our' species was actually smaller."

The researchers also identified 47 other new species of snail in Borneo. The new findings are based on over 25 years of research and documentation of Malaysia's mollusks. 

To find the previously unknown creatures, Schilthuizen said that they gathered bags of soil from the foot of limestone cliffs and then tossed the soil into buckets of water.

"All the sand and clay sinks, but the flotsam contains thousands of empty snail shells, which float," he said. "We would probably not have seen them by the naked eye."

Next, the researchers hope to find living specimens of their newfound mollusks in an effort to better understand and protect them.

"Our method yields mostly empty shells," Schilthuizen said, "so we are still in the dark about their ecology and behavior."

The newly discovered land snails are slow-moving and tend to remain in the same small habitats for generations. In fact, seven of the new species can only be found in the highest mountain in Malaysia, Borneo's Mount Kinabalu. Another newfound species lives only at a cave entrance in Malaysia's second highest mountain, Mount Trusmadi.  

Since they tend to remain in small areas for a long period of time, the snail species are endemic to Borneo, and are similar to the finch species that Darwin encountered on the Galapagos Islands in 1835.

The land snails, however, are not small enough to be crowned the smallest in the world. A sea snail, Ammonicera minortalis, holds that record as it ranges in size from about 0.32 to 0.46 millimeters in length.

Also on HuffPost Science:

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Chihuahua Puppy With Broken Legs Found In Dumpster

Who could do such a thing?

A Chihuahua puppy with two broken legs was abandoned in a dumpster at Santa Rosa Junior College in California, and the heartless culprit has yet to be found.

A worker for Sonoma County Animal Services told The Huffington Post on Wednesday that the dog is "doing well but ... is going to need to have surgery on both front legs." 

According to a release issued Tuesday by the Santa Rosa Junior College police, the dog was found Oct. 27 by a school employee, who took the puppy to a local animal hospital.

Sonoma County Animal Services is conducting an investigation along with the police, according to the release. The dog had no ID tags or microchip.

"We all must work together in keeping our pets and our community safe," police said.

H/T San Francisco Chronicle

 

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Abandoned Kitten Born Without Eyes Gets Second Chance At Life

Things are looking better for a kitten in Plainfield, Illinois, who was born without eyes.

The tiny tabby was found abandoned on a lawn Sunday morning by a family who called Wags 2 Wishes, a local animal rescue society, in hopes of saving the kitten.

Terry Crotty, Wags 2 Wishes founder, told Plainfield Patch that the kitten was so young that "it looked like her eyes were just opening.” However, a vet examined the kitten and saw something more disturbing: the animal had been born without eyes.

Although Crotty says she can't prove anything, she believes the kitten, which has since been named Freya, was abandoned because of its deformity.

"I honestly think [Freya] came from a litter," she told ABC News. "The homeowners looked all over to try to find more kittens because if there's one, there's got to be more and there were none."

The vet who examined the eyeless kitten has since sewn her eye sockets shut in order to prevent infection.

Freya is unusual in other ways besides being born without eyes: she's female even though the majority of tabbies are male.

Despite a harrowing start in life, Crotty told ABC News that Freya is a lover, not a fighter.

"She wants nothing more than to love on you and be close to you and snuggle you," Crotty said.

Happily for Freya, a Wags 2 Wishes volunteer who specializes in caring for animals with disabilities is interested in adopting her.

We have received many calls regarding Freya the kitten that was found in a yard in Plainfield and born with no...

Posted by Wags 2 Wishes Animal Rescue on Tuesday, November 3, 2015

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These 10 Women Entrepreneurs Are Smoking The Marijuana Industry

PORTLAND, Ore. -- With recreational marijuana now legal in the state, entrepreneurs in Oregon are showing that the end of prohibition isn't just about smoking joints legally. It's good business, and the drug is both lucrative and popular in the places that have legalized it.

On July 1, Oregon joined Washington state, Alaska, Colorado and the District of Columbia in legalizing marijuana possession. A system to buy and sell cannabis wasn't set up until Oct. 1, so the state is only just beginning to see the monetary benefits of the plant.

While it may not be the safest or easiest move, marijuana's power players -- many of them women -- are proving that leaving your job for cannabis isn't as intimidating as it might seem. To help connect some of these leaders, a group called Women Grow has come together to offer regular meetings and employment events to female marijuana entrepreneurs across the country.

Women Grow's biggest chapter is in Portland. The group connected The Huffington Post with 10 female leaders in the marijuana industry who live and work in the area, some of whom are members of Women Grow. While their backgrounds vary, these women all have one thing in common: They take weed seriously. Some of them left their day jobs to work in the industry, which is a daunting task. Weed is still illegal at a federal level, and nobody knows when a bank might shun a business for dealing in cannabis, a lawyer might drop a case or federal agents might come knocking.

These women are some of the people who are navigating those gray areas. Here are their stories:

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