Tuesday, 26 August 2014

Look At This 29-Year-Old Virgin

This is Patrick.

Patrick is a very large, very old wombat who lives at a wildlife preserve in Ballarat, Australia.

At 29 years old, poor Patrick is also a virgin.

He came out of the womb at a time when life was simpler. Now, as a young adult, our boy is having trouble looking for that special someone to do ... whatever the hell wombats do to each other.

So we've let Patrick make a dating profile. If you know any wombats in your area looking to meet a refined single male, please don't hesitate to reach out to us in the comments below!

Name: Patrick

Occupation: Just chillin in mom's basement, playing some WoW, drinkin' Mountain Dew

Likes:

  • Cuddles


  • Leaves and stuff


  • International politics


  • Juggalos


  • Gnawing wood


  • Existentialism


  • Grey's Anatomy


patrick

Dislikes:

  • When people mistake me for a beaver


  • Wine snobs


  • Running


  • The San Diego Chargers


  • Crippling depression


  • Becky


Ideal partner: I'm not looking for some one-night-stand. I'm just hoping to meet that special someone who will always go to wom-bat for me.

Ideal date: Maybe we could go to Chuck E. Cheese, swim around in the ball pit, and see what happens.

wombat



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Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/08/26/29-year-old-virgin-wombat_n_5716565.html?utm_hp_ref=weird-news&ir=Weird+News

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